How to help manage stress more effectively
Originally this article was written for Mental Health Awareness week in 2017, but the lessons within are universal all the time. Hope the guidance comes in handy.
In the U.K. there is currently a lot of media coverage for Mental Health Awareness week (8th to 14th May 2017). In the last few months there has been more media attention on improving the nation’s mental health, from the Royal Prince’s Heads Together campaign, to the Conservative party pledging 10,000 more NHS staff in their General Election campaign.
Dealing with everyday and chronic stress
The advice here is that though we ordinarily think that ‘stress is bad’, but stress is actually a normal and good thing! If we didn’t have stress to prod us, we’d sit around and do nothing! Acute (or every day) stress is stuff that happens in front of us and we adjust to.
Chronic stress is more dangerous as this is where stress has become a normal mental state for an individual and they are incapable of functioning without it. We’re all susceptible to experiencing this at times, and the World can feel overwhelming.
Some common symptoms of chronic stress to be aware of are:
- A continual feeling of tiredness
- More frequent irritability
- Poor sleep
- Lower self-esteem
- Feelings of low confidence and feeling undervalued.
Know your triggers!
One of the problems people often repeat is that they know the things that can set them off, but do little about identifying and stopping the beginnings of a negative spiral! Monday mornings, not going to bed early enough, overdoing it on the sherry, comfort eating (or skipping meals), ignoring pressing emails or deadlines — I bet you can second guess most of them! But before you get dragged down the possible whirlpool of negative feelings and emotions these can cause, take some time to know what can set off the red mist, and begin to formulate a better plan for how you’re going to deal with the things that might set you off!
Coping strategies: One way to deal with feelings of frequent stress are to list your troubles and come up with a plan of how you are going to deal with the feelings you experience along with the triggers that set off your stress levels. When we are stressed, we are more likely to just react, and so you have to be the expert at recognising your negative reactions and don’t accept them as normal.
If you don’t know how to help yourself or struggle with enacting this advice, it might be worth considering seeking support and guidance from a professional.
Creating Happiness Lists
Another tool to deal with stress once you have a better handle on managing those unhelpful reactions is to work at your happiness levels. From experience, I have met a lot of people who experience unhappiness from time to time but struggle as they aren’t being proactive in getting themselves into a happier place. You can’t ‘think yourself happy’, that’s just unrealistic, particularly if you’re going through a tough time.
But if you work at doing things that make you happier, the better, more positive feelings come from you taking the time to help yourself. Ideally, this reduces the amount of cortisol (stress hormone) you experience allowing better, more helpful hormones to flow
Short term (immediate) lists
Sit down with a piece of paper or your ‘notes’ app on your phone and answering the question: “What things make me happy?”
In the short term, this might be something like ‘Going to the gym or having a run,’ or as he says, ‘Taking the time for a coffee’ (and not feeling guilty for doing so!).
When you’ve written the 4 or 5 things out that you know are your happiness factors, ask yourself honestly, how recently you did those 4 or 5 things! If you haven’t in the past fortnight, put plans in place to do them!
Long term list
As well as doing things for immediate gratification, our emotional minds like to know what we have lined up and have things to look forward to. If having quality times with friends is important to you, reach out to those friends and set up a meal, a night out or an activity you think you’ll all enjoy. Holidays and timeout are important for us to look forward to and help us cope with short-term periods of intense work or projects we have to deliver. But think about the particular things that your mind and emotions will look forward most to.
Overall
These are just a few tips to get you thinking about taking ownership of stress management and increasing your overall well being. If you like what I’ve said here but you want more structure with some tools you can actually implement, Connecting with People have provided the following on this link: http://www.connectingwithpeople.org/content/mhaw17
- Worksheets for coping
- A self-care maintenance plan
- An Emergency Self-care stress plan
I see a lot of people being ‘human doings’ rather than ‘human beings’ — In the modern ‘always connected’, fast-paced World, I meet a lot of clients who see taking time for themselves as self-indulgent or another task for their to-do list that they don’t want to face.
But your mental well being is ultimately your responsibility and if you want to feel fully in charge, it is worth the investment to help you best manage yourself and ultimately be more like the real you. Have a good week and I hope you continue to make your mental well being an ongoing habit so you thrive not just survive! #mentalhealth
If you want any support for the issues I’ve raised in this article, you can find out more about me at: https://wakelet.com/@stuholliday
Email me: focusedmindcoaching at gmail.com
Find us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/focusedmindcoaching/
Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/focusedmindcoaching/
